Over the past five months or so the boys have been going through a season. A SEASON. The kind of season that puts knots in your neck, fire in your eyes and grit in your teeth.
I know (in my head) that it is just a season and it is warming me up for adolescence but recently it has been wearing me down. My prayer life has begun to consist of these gems,
"just get me through without yelling. Please."
"I need your strength. NOW."
"Make it stop."
But it doesn't really stop, it just ebbs and flows. Some days they take turns whose day it is to drive mommy to her knees, other days, it is double barreled.
Recently after a breakfast in which warnings, time outs and tantrums occurred I was doing devotions with them. Quite honestly, my heart was not in it. "What's the point? They are just going to tune it out. Why bother?"
But I kept going. I'm stubborn. I am not going to be beat by a pair of preschoolers. We will be reverent whether they like it or not.
And then, after prayers I had a boy on my lap and a boy laying beside me and neither was fighting. I was holding and patting and they were letting me. And I started to sing. No one piped up "no thank-you" they just let me sing. So for ten minutes we sat there, wrapped in each other and enveloped in hymns.
It was a pocket of peace. My soul drank it in, was nourished, calmed and strengthened.
Eventually they tired of the sitting and life continued on. They were still as combative as ever but I was changed.
I realized this is the way life goes. Every so often I am blessed to happen upon a stream in the desert, I am refreshed and continue the journey. I'm still in the desert, but now I can go on.
Sunday, August 31, 2008
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11 comments:
Wow. Just... wow.
THAT was a stream in the desert for me. Thank you. So well said, well-written, powerful. Just thank you.
Beautiful.
And I agree. Those streams, however small, are perfect restoration. And they always seem to come at just the right time.
What a beautiful picture. Thanks for sharing it and keeping it in front of you during all the copious timeouts and 'character building moments.'
That was really moving - I'm all teary-eyed. You do a really good job of seeing the positive amidst the craziness.
Sigh. That was wonderful. I treasure those times amidst the chaos too!
You are wise to realize the oasis moments in the midst of the desert. I find the more often I recognize them, the more often they seem to occur. And by often I mean once in a while. But they do recharge the soul and give you strength for the rest of your Mommy journey.
Whooohee, Girl! Lovely. Just ...lovely. You hit it out of the ballpark on this one. Here's to finding streams in the desert!
How True! How beautifully put!
What a beautiful post. Thank you so much for sharing it with us. Your pocket of peace sounds like such a blessing.
So perfect, a lovely, refreshing moment.
Your prayer list made me laugh so hard, mine often looks the same.
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