Tuesday, May 26, 2009

It Only Looks Easy

For the childless friend who wondered why I love grocery shopping alone so much, a breakdown on popping into a grocery store with two boys.

I needed milk, orange juice, and wanted to use up a coupon for Wagon Wheels that were on sale. That's it.

So, I went to grab a loonie for the cart only to discover that Way Cooler had taken all my change out of the car. All of it. Thanks sweetie. So, we toddled into the very, very large store and walked over to customer service for change. Then, Sprout had to go to the bathroom so we stopped for that. Funny how he can go 5 hours without needing the potty at home and when we are errand running he has to go every 37 minutes.

Potty break over, we got our change and headed to the other side of the store to grab a cart. They were out of carts. Of course. So, back to the other side we headed, but not before we petted the fake dog and looked at all the cheap loonie trinkets.

Once we had the cart I loaded up the boys and turned to look for the Wagon Wheels. In the 4.6 seconds my head was turned Sprout disobeyed my direct instructions and attempted to backflip out of the cart. He was successful. The sound of his head hitting the ground still rings in my ears.

Once all the blood was cleaned up and Sprout somewhat consoled we headed for the dairy case. One hand pushing the cart, the other holding 28 pounds of sniffling boy.

They were out of our brand of milk. The only milk they had tastes what I imagine raw sewage tastes like. Strangely enough I took a pass on that. Which means, I now had another stop to make. Yee haw.

They were sampling fruit gummies and chocolate chip cookies. I thought this might distract the still-sobbing Sprout so I gave them each a gummie and a bite of cookie. Turns out Spud did not like the gummies so thought the best way of dealing with it was to spit out everything, cookie and all onto his shirt. Problem solved. So, now I had one child covered in blood and snot and the other with a large mess of chocolate spit on his shirt. Klassy.

But hey, we finally found the wagon wheels, got the juice and checked out without further complications. 45 questions, two minor tantrums, a stop at the fish tank and a lot of strange looks, but no complications. Only 47 minutes after we entered the store we were on our way.

So, sweet friend, any questions?

14 comments:

Knittinchick said...

Hey! I never said that I wondered why you loved grocery shopping by yourself. I think that I said that it was a shame that was your favorite thing when you have alone time...

Seriously tho' that sounds like it takes painful moments to a new level. Enjoy the wagon wheels!

granola_granny said...

I feel your pain.

momofthecrazies said...

Spud spit food out?!?

I had a surprisingly good shopping trip to Superstore (since you know how much I "love" Superstore!) I looked at the Wagon Wheels but resisted temptation. I did give into the Fudge Crackle ice cream though!

Jennifer said...

That is such a typical outing with children. I am even excited to only have to take one child instead of two or three.

Aunt LoLo said...

HAHAHAHAHA...this is why my husband and I head to Costco, together, with the kids every Frday night. 4 hands, 2 kids, one cart...it evens the odds out!

Dawn and Dale said...

I understand completely!! That's why Dale stays home with the kids and I go to Prince George buy myself shopping! I love it!

Congrats on winning over at the SALSA site!! I was surprised and excited when I saw you were the winner!! :)

Janet said...

Yep. That sounds about right.

Lady Why said...

OK, for those of us that don't speak Canadian, what are wagon wheels and what is a loonie? And, do I assume correctly from your post that you have to pay for the use of a shopping cart? [those of us below the Mason Dixon line call those things 'buggies':-)] Like actual money? Broaden my never-been-more-than-500-miles-in-any-direction horizons!

happygeek said...

For the lovely Lady Why,
A Wagon Wheel is a marshmallow and chocolate cookie. We RARELY buy them as they are not at all good for you, but they are terribly yummy. I had a good coupon and the store had a sale and i succumbed to temptation.
At certain stores, you must put in a loonie (the one dollar coin) to free the cart and when you are done shopping and return the cart you get the money back.
I really don't like the system, but what can you do?
In Texas they called carts baskets. It was terribly confusing. Here a basket is the small handheld basket that you use for small purchases.

mamabeck said...

I'm feelin' your pain, here, too.

I went into the hardware store yesterday...for two things...with five children. I think I'm certifiable. ;)

b

Beck said...

Grocery shopping by myself has now taken on Day At The Spa levels of awesomeness. I wonder if it will stay this enjoyable forever, if I'll be 82 and ALL RIGHT! I GET TO BUY GROCERIES!

a Tonggu Momma said...

Heck, I just love leaving the house without anyone else in tow. I feel almost ecstatic before I even pull out of the neighborhood. And grocery shopping alone? Pure bliss!

CC said...

I don't get it.

what's the problem here?

;) ;)

Equidae said...

went shopping recently had to grab last 2 items....my 4 month old starts howling the house down. left hubby in the middle of the shop not sure what he had to do and ran outside....needed diaper change and milk but no one said so quietly like seem from sound asleep he turned his voice on like crazy...