I'd like to take this moment to thank my parents from the bottom of my worn out little heart for this respite. If nothing else, the boys needed a break from the crazy lady who snaps a lot.
So, with a whole day of freedom before me I headed to the mall. Before I had children and still had a somewhat normal shaped body I could spend a leisurely couple of hours bargain shopping. Now the mall is the place I get stared at a lot. This is mainly because Spud hates to shop. He copes with the utter boredom of it all by singing. Mainly gospel songs. At decibel levels on par with a monster truck rally.
I must tell you, there is nothing quite like trying to wade through an overcrowded rack of half-priced sweaters to the tune of "I've Got a Hallelujah Heart." Not to be outdone, Sprout pretends to be a police car and either turns on his siren or arrests unsuspecting items from the new Spring line.
It makes me almost nostalgic for the days when I could strap them both into the stroller and just keep dumping the snacks out. But then I remember all the times that the boys felt the need to fling their gerber fruit puffs at the nearest moving object. Usually some 19 year old twinkie whose fashion sense was a lot bigger than her sense of humour.
Anyway, to be at the mall alone was right up there with salted dark chocolate and a spa day.
PLUS, it was like the mall heard I was coming and got all the bargains ready for me. I was in desperate need of some new runners (sneakers for all you American types) and a purse. I am of the belief that shoe shopping and purse shopping are right on the same level as root canals, so I wandered into lots of other stores to ease the pain.
Within 2.5 hours I had two new pairs of dress slacks (and by dress slacks I mean pants that aren't jeans) a new shirt, a sweater and a purse from my new boyfriend Mr. Tommy Hilfiger and the whole thing cost me sixty five dollars.
I've got a hallelujah heart.
(I also had a new pair of runners, but I over-pronate and have arch issues and wide feet and will someday no doubt need orthotics so therefore have to spend more money than I care to think about on runners.)
Then I came home and took a bath with my other boyfriend, Mr. Tom Clancy and now I am writing to my imaginary friends. (I write ahead, you won't read this till Monday.) Later tonight I am going to a grown up restaurant with yet another boyfriend (but this one ins't named tom, Tommy or Thomas.)
It's pretty much the PERFECT day off.
And tomorrow I get to go pick up my two favorite Valentines.
Which is also perfect.