Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Liar, Liar

Spud is nearly four. Just saying that phrase can reduce his poor father to mush. He hates to see them grow up. Have I ever mentioned how much I adore a man in love with his kids?

Adore it.

Anyway, as he approaches four we are hitting a new phase. Lying. Not exactly my favorite, but right now he is pretty lousy at it.

Not only does his face give him away, so does the fact that he is usually clutching the evidence.

For example, I hear screaming and come racing upstairs. "Spud, why is Sprout crying?"

"Well, well, well, well, he bumped his head against the wall."

"If he bumped his head against that wall on the far side of the room why is he lying at your feet with a welt on his arm?"

"well, well, well, well"

"Sprout, why are you crying?"

"Spud hit truck"

"Spud hit you with the truck, the one still in his hand?"

"Weeees" (accompanied by heart-wrenching sobs - I've got an Academy Award winner in that one for sure.)

"Spud, did you hit Sprout with the truck?"

"Well, well, well, he ran into it"

"So, let me get this straight, he didn't hit the wall but rather ran into the truck while you were holding it? Sprout, I'm pretty sure you're going to live so knock it off."

"Well, well, well, yes."

"Mmm hmmm."

(I should point out that Spud did have a problem with stuttering. It's basically cleared up except when he is making up a story. It's a PRETTY BIG clue that what you are about to hear is probably fabricated.)

The conclusion of of that particular incident came when Spud demonstrated for me how Sprout came to run into the truck. We discovered that Spud's arm had to move pretty fast and pretty hard to "coincide" with Sprout's exact position so that Sprout could "run into" the truck.

Whenever I am dealing with Spud's dissembling (and trust me, we are really really dealing with it, I need to be able to trust my kids) I can't help but think of all the parents over the years who would tell me "Mrs. Geek, I know my kid pretty well and they don't lie" "Why would my kid lie to me?" Or my FAVORITE "My son has never lied to me in all his ten years."

I really must be doing something wrong then.

Snort.

7 comments:

THE ROOST said...

It is amazing how some mothers memories are absent when it comes to what their kids did wrong. It is great that you stated it so clearly! Great post!

KnittinChick said...

Yes! I have some good stories of parents blaming other volunteers who only see their kids once a week for some rather 'salty' language... but that will be another blog post. Sometimes I wondered if I actually looked that stupid.

Hang in there with the 'creative storytelling.' You're right that it's easy to bust a four year old.

Bargainista said...

As they get a little older a line you might want to try w. them is, "Just tell me the truth, and the consequences will be easier but if you waste my time and yours on 'stories' you are going to get the book thrown at you".

Char and Avery said...

I have a friend who told her kids that they got a dot on their forehead whenever they lied, that was how she knew they were lying. Eventually, the kids would hold a hand over their forehead each time they lied!! Hahahaha!!!

My favorite stage (not) was when Emma lied about EVERYTHING, even things of no consequence. She'd come upstairs barefoot and say "I didn't take my socks off". Hmmmmm.....

Janet said...

Oh, I HATE it when they lie to me! HATE IT! We definitely step on that fast too. You're right, you have to be able to trust them.

Sarah said...

That is a great recount of the incident! :-) Don't you love how they seem to think that the reason is SOOO logical?
Perhaps I am overly cynical....but I think 99% of the time, I do not take my child's word first. At least in areas of conflict....I know my children are dishonest--that is the part of their nature that I am supposed to help shape for the better!
Good luck--my 4 yr. old has been having the same "problem"!

granola_granny said...

The Mom with the kid who hadn't lied in all his ten years.... is unfortunately learning from the the best.
One thing I sometimes say to a Grade Oner as we begin to dig down through layers of un or half truths is.... "Is there anything that you would like to change in your story before we go any further?" Sometimes they actually get a relieved look and spill the beans... the truthful beans that is.